Dreams~

I'm not dead, neither is it on purpose

2009-03-21T23:50:00.007+08:00

Firstly, allow me to explain my absence. First, my monitor crashed on me so I had to rob my dad's monitor. But that has got nothing to do with it. Second, my computer crashed cause of a virus. Talk about bad luck, I'm the centre of it. After my computer crashed and sent to fix, my thumbdrive with all my hard work too, crashed and I had to re-format it. Really wanted to cry then, had no backup at all and had to finish so many presentations in a week just so I can present it during the following week. Anyway, when my pc came back from fixing, all was fine. Then, my monitor came back. After a few hours that it was plugged in and the pc guy left, my pc fked up again, leaving it to restart on its own over and over and over again. Then he only could come by a day after the next to come fix it. Lucky it was FOC. Or I would really have exploded.

Anyway, forget all my bad luck. I think it's all over now. College has been good to me so far. My marks made up for all that above.

My mum, Carey and Bryan left for Japan with my two aunts last Saturday and are coming back tomorrow night. Leaving me to mommy the house, my dad, Cassy and Chubby. Then, sum it all up with the upcoming or now I should say, past assessments and presentations, it was hell. But well, at least now I know how my mum feels. Sometimes I wonder why though, she never shows concern towards me, not even on the day that she left for Japan. She only went on and on about taking care of Cassy. Sigh. Not like complaining is going to do me any good.

Just suck it up and get on with it I always say.

Last Tuesday, I brought Chubby to work with me. And by work what I mean is just sitting in my dad's office and helping him keep a lookout while he goes offsite to work. It was fun seeing Chubby so excited.

Here he is, being kepoh with everything around him, and constantly looking at me, wondering when will I be taking him out.His reaction when I ask 'Chubby, what you want?'. Tilts his head slightly, until he gets bored, he'll look away.And this is just him, being plain adorable.

On Wednesday, I had 2 assessments and 2 presentations which was totally unprepared for, one even took me by surprise. But at least could do so it's pretty ok.

Then on Thursday, had another presentation. This time its Geography. Something everyone hates but still has to do. I'm really sorry Leifennie, June and Kean Hong for scolding you guys. I lost it. And I'm really sorry. Went home and made Chicken Chop for dinner. Marinated it with Chinese and Western ingredients, but it actually turned out smelling good and tasting not bad. I even put mashed potatoes as its side. Check it out :D

I freakking missed Pink Day cause I had to go sit in the office on Friday. I saw June's blog and it's super pink. I cant believe I missed out on it!! Darn. But at least my dad took my out that night and bought me two books which I have been looking forward to for a long time.

Cupcake Creations!! Decorate 'em cupcakes.

Collins Japanese phrasebook. Ureshii yo~

Went over to Ethan's to watch Sex Drive today. Its a totally lame movie that we didn't even finish it. Going to help out for Campus Day tomorrow and I'm getting paid~! Woot!

2nd March 2009

2009-03-02T19:49:00.008+08:00

I only had 4 hours of sleep. Woke up at 5.30 again today and left the house at 6.15. Wet market educational visit, they say. Then before I left the house, I had to re-park my sister's and my dad's car, a Vios and a Stavic respectively. Really proud of myself though, my judgment exceeds me. The Vios was a few inches away from the wall and the Stavic was only 1-1.5 inches away from the Vios. If I had banged the car(s), I would have been screwed. Real bad. And speaking of cars and crashing, I almost kissed a Black Myvi on my way to the church at night on Saturday. It rained and the road was slippery and I was sleepy. I breaked, the car 'slided' until it was just maybe milimetres away from the Myvi. My legs turned jello straightaway. Anyway, back to this morning. When I drove out and reached the LDP, you wouldn't believe how happy I was. The roads were empty. Look.

This was along the LDP.

Then I reached under the stinking bridge on the way to college. This place is always, ALWAYS jam. Except during the night.

So, I turned into Mentari, which is also empty.

Ended reaching there at 6.30-6.40 and read Rooms Division notes.

Later, when Leifennie, Kean Hong and June reached, we left for the market, all dressed up like aunties and uncles. We reached right on schedule which is at 7.30, but we stayed in the car and talked about Leifennie's horny enquiries weekend experience for half an hour instead. Leaving poor poor Mr. Kean Hong quiet and dumbfounded and wondering where he should hide his face.

Next is the real visit. I took too many pictures -.- Took one of each store of the whole wet market. Now I feel stupid. But if it makes the report longer.. To heck with stupidity! I only put the nicest of the batch here. So, no stealy me no likey.

Groceries.

Vegetables.

Poultry or in lay man's term, CHICKEN. See the black small dot? Its a fly.

Fruits with expensive mangoes and long overdue mandarin oranges.

While everyone was busy oogling at the kitten, I stole a shot with Fia.

Beef. He just butchered it and hung it up. Like in the Midnight Meat Train. Ew.

Fish. Lots and lots of fish. *glee*

Eggs. You can never have enough.

The last stop, Tofu. It stinks. LoL.

On the way back, we saw some pretty amuzing things. One which Leifennie labelled as Arouse AkuYa from Eros AkuYa.

Wallah. The hair studio which Leifennie cant get enough of.

Then, there's the Ps Galore!! The most we saw was 4 in a row. Connect-4 XD

Remember how I said I was studying Rooms Division? I had my final assessment today, which I thought was just a regular assessment. Lucky I crammed, or I would have been screwed. Fking screwed. The paper turned out quite straight forward. Really big LUCKY.

Went home after lunch and due to the lack of sleep, I died on the sofa. Died. But before I died, I saw some green residue on the floor in Chubby's home. He puked it. Wonder what he ate. It was really green. Big Ew. Looked for dinner when I woke up, went down stairs, scanned, went back up and asked my mum 'where's the food? @@' and she replied 'I thought you didn't want to eat so we didn't tapau anything home. @@' and we both just stared at each other.

Happy Anniversary!

2009-03-01T22:04:00.009+08:00

Today is a very special day. Very very special day. It's me and my leng chai's 4th anniversary!! He came over at around 10.30 in the morning and we went out for brunch cause we were both freaking starving. So this is what we had.

Here he is, examining his red tea, which isn't red.

And in front of me is my honey peach tea which is really sweet.

My fish head noodles, or as they call it canton, yu tau mai. Milky and has the chinese cooking wine. Love this dish.

This is Ethan's beef kuew teow. Looks really appealing.

Bon apetit, Ethan~!

I almost forgot, we also had a side, called the 'Fish with Asparagus', which Ethan helped me suck out all the asparagus leaving just the fish for me. :D

After brunch, we headed back to my place and started baking. There were two items on the menu today. First up, Blueberry Cupcakes!

Ethan was mixing in the blueberries into the cake batter.

Here's how it looked like.

Now he's scooping the batter into tiny paper cups.

Here's all 30 of them. Uncooked.

We left them in the oven and took a picture. He's laughing cause I'm short and was struggling to tiptoe and he was slightly bent down.

And now the staring begins.

The mediocre batch came out after around 20 minutes.

5 minutes later the 'flat' batch came out.

Another 15 minutes later, the uber batch was completed. Put them all together and this is what you get, the cooked product. All 30 of them.

After taking a half an hour break, we proceeded with the second item on the menu today. Chewy Chocolate Cookies. Something completely new to both of us. And instead of using baking/cooking chocolate, we used Cadbury!

Ethan was beating the eggs, sugar and vanilla while I was holding a pot of hot melted chocolate beside him.

I added it in, he continued beating, and here's the result. Really thick and sticky.

We added in some chocolate chunks and piped it out using piping bags. They looked like shit. Like diorrhea. With some stools. We laughed like mad. By the way, this is Ethan's batch.

This is my batch, with the same shit description. Just with more spots. Already baking in the oven.

Here he is, resting his head on my lap. Tired. Both of us were.

We went back in to check on our cookies and we went 'OMG!'.

And then, 'omg -.-'. It burnt.

Ethan tasted it. I need not say more.

Actually his one wasn't that bad, it was just my batch that got burnt. And become rocks. But his batch didn't set. So it broke. This cookie was a failure. It was chewy though. Just not cookie like. So he managed to only peel of scraps of it which was still sticking to the parchment. Then we cleaned up, threw the rest away, and took a nap. We deserved it. And I like napping with him. It's nice and comfortable. Spooning. It's free. And it's the best.

Anyway...

HAPPY 4TH ANNIVERSARY!!!

I LOVE YOU, ETHAN!!!

28th February 2009

2009-02-28T19:37:00.006+08:00

I'm back after my long long break from blogging. I know I promised Kenny a long post this time, but there's so much I just don't know where to begin and what to put in. So, in the end I just figured, 'Why not just start blogging about my day again?'. Here it is.

Haven't been getting enough sleep lately. It's always either 5-6 hours only. Maybe even less. Started a new course in January at Taylor's College School of Hospitality and Tourism, and the new course is, as you've guessed it, Diploma in Hospitality Management, or to make it sound more fanciful, it's called Bacalauret Technologique Hotelerie. Not sure if I spelled it correct though. Met some cool new people and also hooked up with some seniors, something I never got to do at SEGi. There's Leifennie, June, Kean Hong and many more. We get really crazy. Then, there is McYummy. And of course, alot of cute and hot accented French lecturers.

Enough about that, now to proceed with my day.

My eldest sister, Carey and her boyfriend, Bryan, has a Jack Russell, named Chubby. And boy does he live up to his name. Meet Chubby.

Check out his super stomach.

This morning, I caught his being really lazy. Here's a chronology of his laziness.

He was happily lying on his back. His stomach has grown many times bigger.

He saw me, hence the yawning and stretching begins.

He continues stretching.

He lets out another yawn.

He just lies there now. Not moving.

Then my younger sister, Cassy, bend over and scratches his chest. 'What bliss' he must think.

Lower please. Mmmm that feels good.

Chubby is the baby of the family. As shown above, it's quite obvious.

Then went along and did my usual Saturday chores of fetching Cassy around. My French class was supposed to start this weekend but the teacher caught a flu so it got cancelled. Went over to Ethan's place and had half of his breakfast of curry noodles at around 1.30p.m. Then, we went to One Utama and got ourselves A&Ws. He ate a Coney Dog and drank a float while I ate waffle with ice-cream and drank rootbeer. After A&W, we ate Takoyaki (octopus ball) and Okonomiyaki (Japanese pancake) at Tako Tao outside of Cold Storage. Check out Ethan's blog for more information on the Takoyaki and Okonomiyaki if you're interested. He should be updating soon. While he was busy taking pictures of the process of making the Takoyaki, I headed over to Cold Storage to get chocolates for our baking day 4th year anniversary tomorrow. We're unique.

After all that, we had to leave cause of Cassy's youth thing at the church. After sending her there, I headed back over to Ethan's place and napped there while he played Left for Dead. Woke up and it was time to take Cassy home from church. Now it's time for dinner. Guess what I had.

Thin crust Aloha Chicken

Thin crust Chicken Pepperoni

Hot and spicy Chicken Wings.

Bread sticks.

Kaya and banana dessert.

You've guessed it, it's Domino's! And June, if you're seeing this, it's exactly the same as what we ate the other day, just with a little extra. And it's only for 3 pax. My parents and Carey went down to Perak to visit my grandma and also to take my aunt's passport. They're going to Japan in two weeks. And I'm getting my laptop upon their arrival. But that's way out of topic. Back to dinner and me and Cassy and Bryan. To summarize us, we're such pigs.

Just went for my Orientation dinner organized my the lecturers on Wednesday and the pictures are all with June. Hope she gives it to me soon and I'll get to blog about it!

That Was Fast

2008-09-09T22:38:00.002+08:00

I resigned from work, like on Saturday cause the working hours were too long and abnormal for my family. But I did learn a lot. Like how to meddle around with the POS System and how it's like when there are only 3 people working an overly crowded restaurant. Well, at least I earned around 200+. That's a start. Got to go look for something else to do soon. Like, real soon. With all the shifting going on now, can't really do much.

I most definitely and absolutely love the Twilight saga by Stephenie Meyer. I'm so hooked onto it I think that I'm addicted. I finished 3 books [Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse] in a week and now I'm already on to the fourth and final book, Breaking Dawn. Maybe it's just cause I'm a sucker for romance and this has got me going. A girl needs to fulfill her fantasies know? Since it's impossible in real life, so I'll let the books do the job for me.

First Book

Second Book

Third Book

Fourth Book

First Movie

After seeing all this, I am dieing to see the movie, but as the poster thing stated, it only comes out like in December. I'm really tempted to get a whole set of the book for myself too. Just so that I HAVE a set. Still debating though. This [being so physicked about a book series] has not happen in a very very very long time. Can't wait. Really want time to fly.

First Day, First Time, First Experience

2008-09-01T23:58:00.002+08:00

Today was the first day of my part time service crew job at Dessert's Bar! Quite fun actually, got to eat free ice cream and taste all the ice cream. Going to learn how to make the desserts tomorrow too. Good experience. Then after standing there for around 5 hours, I got a surprise visit from Ethan and Owen. I just stood there dumbfounded. Like 'omg why're you here' type of look. LoL. Ok, too tired to type anything else. I'll leave it to this. Going to be shifting in two weeks time too. Maybe I'll get my new phone then and start taking pictures at my work place when taht happens. If they allow me. Hehe.

Happy 3 1/2 years anniversary to Ethan and I!!!

Messages

2008-08-27T01:03:00.002+08:00

I just went over to Taylor's PJ today to check out the Hotel Management course today. They're increasing the fees next year and I won't be eligible for the SPM High Achievers Scholarship anymore. More the reason to work. For the first time, I saw alot of Ethan's course mates. All of them seem to be really fun people. I'm really looking forward to next January too. Will be able to experience the real college life and not that of being super relaxed like in school. Having more challenges and work is fun.

Currently don't know what to work as though. Waitress and sales promoters to my parents are a waste of time cause the hours are long and I don't learn anything. But still, I'll be making stuffed bears and scarves to past my time until I find my job. Maybe I can turn my hobbies into sales. Making too much will take up a lot of space too. If anyone is interested please let me know. My stuffed bears are quite standard [low budget; cloth not very fancy; only black and white and some with pattern from before] and I think I should take approximately one week or less to finish one. Many different sizes too, but I only can make it either standing up or sitting down, but not flexible. Have not done the cost calculation yet so I have no idea how much I'm going to sell them for too. Won't be too expensive I think. As for the scarves, I have no idea how long I'll take to finish one. I'm a slow worker. :D But if you are interested in the teddy, please do not hesitate to let me know :D I can attempt to put clothes on them if you want, but plain ones still look best.

When I was eating dinner with my dad tonight, he didn't seem too happy about the idea of me going into Hotel Management. From the looks of it, he probably thinks that I won't be able to handle the workload. He may be right, but I am ready to accept the challenge. He also thinks that I'm influenced by Ethan, but I know myself and I'm not that shallow to get into a program because my boyfriend's in it. That wouldn't make anyone happy. He kept encouraging me to take up a matriculation program and going to Australia straight after and only decide what I want to get into there. My parents both have a mindset that studying overseas is anytime better than studying locally. Well, they have their own point when stating that. Besides, my fees when I study there will be cheaper as my brother's applying for a PR there. But this situation reminds me of the play I saw about a month back at DUMC [Damansara Utama Methodist Church] with Ethan, Owen, their mum, and aunt. It was about a guy who wanted to pursue his dreams but it meant to go against his father's wishes. Then it showed what he had to go through and the strain on the father son relationship. But in the end his father was happy that his son came home and that he was successful, even though he didn't show it. Another message? Another pointer? Does this mean that I should go ahead with what I plan on taking? I really don't know.

Nowadays, suddenly everything seems to patch up into a path which is laid before me. All that's left for me to do is either choose to walk on it, or simply turn away from it.

Changes

2008-08-24T21:56:00.002+08:00

A lot has happened during the past week. For instance, the sudden notification on the discontinuation of Diploma in Electrical and Electronic Engineering at SEGi College Kota Damansara campus. Following their decision, we were given two choices, one was to transfer into Foundation Science and be graded with a test which would determine which semester we should continue with, or second would be to change to the Subang Jaya campus which is pretty far away. No offense to SEGi College, but their management and system is a failure and to ask me to go that far for a service like that is rather wasting. However, if we chose to change college and since it is the management's fault, we'll be given a full refund. That gave everyone a great shock and it was announced right before Malaysian Studies finals, so all of us were down in the dumps and couldn't concentrate properly. But looking back, it isn't such a bad thing. As I've said in one of my previous posts, I have been wondering if I took the right and suitable choice of course. It does determine my future. I started having dreams and many other signs which told me that I'm not cut out for it. Not that I don't like it, but that I'm not cut out for it. So patching all the pieces together, instead of having time turned back, I received a second chance, given by Him. It is, as people say it, a blessing in disguise. It took me many days to figure out something to study but in the end, it came down to Hotel Management. Something with a mixture of practical learning and also book learning and with challenge added to it. Of course nothing comes sugar-coated. The price I have to pay is time. This can be considered as I have wasted one year on doing something which isn't suitable. Since there's still four more months away, I'm going to work to help cover some expenses. Not that it would be anything big, but at least it's something. I need to change my wardrobe too, so I think I can at least do that on my own.

Went out to dinner with Ethan yesterday too. I think he's going to be updating his blog with that in a bit. It was a bit too noisy, but fun none the less. I saw 4-5 skaters jump over 11 people. Of course they were lying down on their sides. At first it was on their back until there was about 7 people, they had to shift to the side. It was amazing. Seeing one group of people working hard to put up an event for people to enjoy really sparks me up. To be able to see the sparkle on people's faces when they're enjoying what you planned it truly over the roof. And yes, I'm a workaholic. :D

2008-08-14T19:44:00.002+08:00

I can't take my family's ethics anymore. They seem to just love torturing me. Thought of complaining to my parents on how the bitch is treating me, I got scolded in return, saying how I was the same when I was younger. None of us, I repeat, NONE, has gone out as much as she has. Also, none talked like her, always angry and always thinking that everyone must obey her. DON'T put me on the same level as her. It's degrading. Don't be mistaken, I'm no angst teenager, I'm just mentally and emotionally scarred by my 'family'. I'm just their toy. They have never asked me how I'm doing in college, clearly, not well. They have never asked me how are my studies, which again clearly, am struggling. All they care to order is 'Remember to fetch Cassy' and never 'How was your day at college?' and 'Is everything ok?'. They only know how to play the guilt game when they're going to put something on me. I've had enough. I can't believe I just tried to suicide by overdose of carbon monoxide. Staying in the car and sleeping seems like the best and most comfortable way. But Ethan. He's the only person keeping me around. Only he cares.

More Complains

2008-08-14T17:54:00.002+08:00

Today is a 'tribute' to Cassy. Show more respect and stop being brat. Don't expect me to respond to your every whim. I am not a robot, neither am I your slave or driver. Yes I will take you to places when you want to, but be reasonable. If I don't fucking know the way, don't pester me anymore. You already took away my weekends and my holidays by expecting me to fetch you everywhere. Worse is, it is either for the whole day, or at an odd time. Meaning, I have to sit at home just to make sure YOU get home. I even take the time and put in effort to make food for you so you don't get hungry. After all that I do for you, all you have to say is just 'MY things always get postponed for YOUR needs' and 'Ew. What is this? Why doesn't it have taste? Why didn't you put condensed milk?'. Show gratitude bitch. MY time is the one always taken up by YOUR needs. Not the other way around. You always just come to me with the venue and time and EXPECT me to bend to suit your needs. And even after all that, you have never said a word of thanks or even put your request in a proper sentence to make it look like I'm not your slave but your sister. Note. SISTER. Not SLAVE. And if everything I make is 'EW' to you, go eat your own shit and see if it taste any better than what I make for you. If it does, yes you can complain. If it doesn't, keep your trap shut. I will be having my finals soon and all you have to say is just 'So? What does it got to do with me?'. You want to know? Plenty. You expect me to fetch you to all the places you want to go, during MY EXAM WEEK. To be more precise, the days of my finals. You're even calling your friends over and think that its funny. Just because YOU fail your exams, doesn't mean I have to fail WITH YOU. Stop being selfish. Just once in awhile I want to go out. Asking you to skip youth, even though you don't learn anything and all you do there is just play, is like requesting for your death. Asking you to come out an hour earlier, is like asking you not to breathe for that long. The world does not revolve around you. My life does NOT revolve around you. Even after my effort of making sure you get to go to church because you skipped for two weeks, all I ask is just for you to come out slightly earlier, you start showing your shit face. If you hate it so much, don't go at all. You have never once asked me how I feel about driving you everywhere. Even when I have a headache, you expect me to take you. One day if I crash and die, make sure you save your life so that you'll know who caused my death. But most probably you'll just blame me for my death and complain that there'll be noone to bend to meet your expectations and sudden and last minute whims again. You expect me to drive tru and fro for 4 times a days and in the end say 'Since I give you the venue and time already, of course I'm expecting you to take me home. Who else?'. What type of person says such things to someone whom they are depending on? If she can't go, again the blame will be on me. I am sick of this. If getting my license means to be YOUR driver, I'll rather burn my license now. What's the point of me trying so hard when at the end of the day I still have to take the heat? If you could ever open up your eyes to everyone else's point of view, this world would be a much better place. Screw you.

Panic! on my study table

2008-08-13T23:40:00.002+08:00

Panic Case 1:

Just went for dinner with Ethan last Saturday (9th August 2008) at his college. Yea. College. Taylor's College for Hotel and Tourism. So the 2nd year diploma students were put up to the task of serving us dinner :D 5 course fine dining thingah majiggy. Delicious by the way. Good job people!
The panic was right before, or few days before the dinner, actually. First fine dining experience so, what all girls (I think) fear, what to wear. And for the first time ever, I actually put on make-up. Not only the lip glass/ lip stick, but with the eye shadow and all. Yes laugh all you want. It's my first time.
Again, same as prom, too bad didn't manage to take any pictures. Really wanted some to keep. With the nice dress and all. Well, I guess there's always next time.
For more info on the dinner, please visit http://eden2812.blogspot.com

Panic Case 2

Finals are just around the corner, and I still haven't completely studied yet. So much for my CGPA of at least 3.54. Theory exam coming soon too. Sigh.

Sometimes I really regret taking Engineering and going to SEGi. People always say, dreams are your hearts desires. I actually had a dream that I did regret taking up Engineering and not take up something more feminine. I like, no, love to cook, so why not culinary? I feel like I've just dug my own grave, and nailed myself into my own coffin. It has already been 2 semesters. If it was the first, it would still be fine. But now its already the end of the 2nd semester. Why not go to Taylor's and take hotel management? Or take up child care or something. Its much more interesting than the crap I'm taking now. I need the company, the people. Being the only student might be getting to me. Then again, this is nobody's fault but my own.

Maybe the dream I had is spiraling me into depression. I've never felt as miserable before. The tears are just waiting for a chance to come out. I can't suddenly tell my mum that I want to change course. She has already paid almost half of my tuition fees. Starting over would just burden her more. Not to mention, it'll consume more time and thus, burdening my mum even more. She's already stressed enough. All that's left for me to do is just to suck it up and continue the path I have laid for myself. Seriously. Just turn back time already.

No Doubt - Running

2008-07-14T02:36:00.003+08:00

No Doubt is not forgotten! I suddenly remembered a song and I'll feel really agitated if I don't put it here. It's really good.

No Doubt - Running
Run
Running all the time
Running to the future
With you right by my side

Me
I'm the one you chose
Out of all the people
You wanted me the most
I'm so sorry that I'm falling
Help me up lets keep on running
Don't let me fall out of love

[Chorus:]
Running, running
As fast as we can
Do you think we'll make it?
(Do you think we'll make it?)
We're running
Keep holding my hand
So we don't get separated

Be
Be the one I need
Be the one I trust most
Don't stop inspiring me
Sometimes it's hard to keep on running
We work so much to keep it going
Don't make me want to give up

[Repeat chorus twice]

(The future)

[Repeat chorus]

For those of you who do not know who is No Doubt, its where Gwen Stefani originated from.

Hair Droppage

2008-07-14T02:22:00.002+08:00

My hair has been dropping off more often lately. Must be due to the excess of assignments. At least none of them are turning white. Yet. When they do, should I pull them out? But they'll grow 3 fold. That sucks, seriously.

I saw the contest on taking photos of your dog on Kenny's blog and I really really really want to enter a picture of my sister's dog. He's a serious cam whore. And really vain one at that. But too bad I'm living in an apartment. My sister's boyfriend and I made a test today and while we were calling him with all sorts of names, he responded differently. Try calling him 'Stupid' and he'll come to you. Call him 'So Hai' and he won't bother about you. Call him 'Leng Chai', he will stop whatever he is doing just to look at you with the look saying 'You called?'. At times he doesn't even respond to his own name. By the way Kenny, the last picture of your dog has my vote~

The college Charity Carnival is coming soon. This coming Saturday, 19th July. But I guess I'll just skip it. No matter how giat I was before. Have to fetch my sister all over the place and to prevent more hair loss, have to complete my butt load of assignments. Have to start studying now too. Since I have my theory exam on the 18th of August and my term finals on the 20th and 22nd of the same month. I have no idea when my Malaysian Studies finals is though. Thank God my English 2 does not come with a final examination. But even without that, I still have to crack my head for the assignment a.k.a research paper.

Even my stomach is failing me. Its the same everyday. Can't eat much and end up with the almost gastric feel. And can't sleep early too. So feel hungry almost instantly. My lifespan may be getting shorter as we speak. Well, at least I got lunch with Ethan to look forward to tomorrow. Back to assignments for now.

Of Lecturers

2008-07-09T19:43:00.002+08:00

Lecturers, like any products, varies depending on the type which you have. Currently, I have... 6 lecturers? Names shall not be included.

Lecturer no. 1
Dude doesn't know how to control his temper. Someone pokes his back, he blames it on the closest person he can find just because that guy is close to the principal.
Teaching style, straight forward, easy to understand. However, there are no extras.
Currently on holiday.

Lecturer no. 2
To replace Lecturer no. 1 during his holiday. Blur who can't pronounce 'tive' and pronounces it as 'tude'. Example: negative = negatude. Wrongs me from right. Then blames me on why I did it the wrong way.
Failed.

Lecturer no. 3
Previously teaches Malaysian Studies in Malay. Does nothing but order us to do presentation and 15-20 page essay.
Failed.

Lecturer no. 4
Taken over Lecturer no. 3. Teaches in English but due to the previous guy's teaching method, notes and exams will still be in Malay. Shortened 15-20 page to 5 pages.

Lecturer no. 5
Tries hard to help us pronounce 'tHree' better. She'll stand there until you get it right. Dedicated woman.
Pass!

Lecturer no. 6
Humble woman. Teaches well. Isn't sensitive about her weight. All time fav.
Pass!

Now it shall be like those 'Which would you choose?'. Lol.

For Ethan <3

2008-07-08T22:41:00.001+08:00

Ethan, this is especially for you.
Even though the time we get to spend with each other is becoming less and less each day. I know that what we feel wouldn't change. We've been through so much before and now is just another phase. Your training is coming pretty soon and I wish you all the best in trials which you may face. After all this is over, we'll be together even more than ever. I love you Ethan and may God be with you always.

Retards again

2008-07-08T22:03:00.003+08:00

Again with retarded drivers. Can they ever learn how to not be retarded? This retarded taxi driver, stopped right outside the turning out of my condo and so I 'bumped' into it. Only his plastic side was a wee bit scratched but my was was dented. His fault. I finally realized. He wasn't supposed to stop there. He was disrupting traffic. That bloody bastard. Cheated me. Next in line, old man picking up his kid from the Chinese school, or also known as 'SJK(C) Damansara'. This retard went to double/triple park and so I couldn't move. I honked him and he f***ing scolded me. What the f*** is wrong with him? In the end I had to move through the small little space that he so 'kindly' provided for me and all the other cars behind me. I managed to squeeze though but not without scratching my tyre. If anything happens to my car, I swear I'll curse that old man until the ends of Earth. Third retard, short one. Just because he has a huge ass car, he went to honk me when i was on the lane beside him just because he was afraid that I would scratch his car. As if that would happen. Stick to your own lane, bastard. To Ethan: not only women drivers are retards.

Enough with retarded people. Everyone is falling sick. My whole family has come down with fever, flu, cough and heatyness. My fever yesterday was so high, my face was flushed. That was a first. Even my course mate @ punching bag @ friend @ 30% is having fever and all sorts. However, I still have to complete 6 assignments. Namely:

Malaysian Studies presentation
Malaysian Studies 15-20 page long essay
English 2 research paper proposal
English 2 research paper
Solid State Devices Shottky Barrier Diode
Case Studies Presentation

Whee :D I would love to crap about my crappy replacement lecturer but I don't feel like it today. And please please group members, stop giving me excuses and spend your time giving me excuses to give me the information. I'm sick and I still got to finish it. Pity me. I have to take a knife and point at 3 out of 5 of you to actually work. Just a figure of speech. I have my English proposal on Friday and I have not even started making the power point yet. I want to panic and cry.

Of Retard Drivers, Weird People and Sorts

2008-06-26T23:57:00.003+08:00

Of Retard Drivers

Today in college, there was this retard of a driver who drove behind me. Here's the whole story; In the college car park, once you enter, you can either turn right or go straight. Since it was quite full, I turned right to check. As I did, the retard in a light brown Proton Wira, entered the car park and went straight. No parking on my side, so i went to rejoin the road where I would have ended up if I went straight. Being a retard, the retard of a driver did not stop to look for cars even though he was about to turn left and there was cars coming from the right (me) and since I was going straight, I didn't have to stop. So the retard jam braked when he saw me. And when he was behind me, he flashed me like nobody's business which was really annoying. Then he just tailed me. Luckily I didn't get pissed off and just jam braked in front of him or he would sure have hit my car and had to pay me. Assholes.

Of Weird People

This woman in the lift, entered the lift on the first floor. She must have pressed both up and down so the lift naturally went down first. She came out of the lift and went 'Eh? Not my floor' and went back in. Now she pressed '7'. Since she might have pressed both up and down, the lift stopped on the first floor. She went out and again went 'Eh? Not my floor' and 'The lift so slow'. Then it stopped on the 6th floor. She did the same thing. The guy beside her finally told her 'This is the 6th floor' and another woman came in. Finally came the 7th floor and she finally got down on the right floor.

Of Sorts

Class was cancelled this morning cause the lecturer fell sick. I'm sick too. So is Kenny and my sister. Everyone is falling sick. Then a friend of mine called me at around 9 and asked 'Where's the class at?' Poor guy didn't get the message sent by the college yesterday. So he had to drive home. The college management really sucks. It sucks big time. Some would get the message and some won't. All retards.
Went for afternoon class and when I went home, I forgot that I had to pick my sister up from school. So I had to drive out again -.-'' Stupid me.

Meh. Sorry for the anger filled post. The bloody retard of a driver gave me a bad mood. Spoiled my day.

16th June 2008

2008-06-16T19:21:00.002+08:00

Watched Kung Fu Panda with my sisters and her boyfriend yesterday. Damn funny! Specially the weird cantonese slang they used!!! Cute too~ I wanna watch it again >.<

Classes finally started again today. After 7-8 weeks of holiday. So started off with Solid State Devices. SUPPOSED to have 5 people, me included, but I was the only one that showed up. Akwardness between one lecturer and one student. Don't know whether to continue with the class or just cancel it. But in the end the class just went on without the others. So I actually told the lecturer that if there's not going to be anyone else, I'm planning on dropping that subject to take another. And he kept saying 'take laaa... If you don't, who I teach?'. So concluded with, 'ok la, we shift the Thursday class to some other time la. So you can take the other subject'. So, yay! F.y.i, the other subject is Engineering Communication and Case Studies which if I don't take now, I'll have to wait another year before it's available again. And since my timetable now is so free, might as well take the extra. Get everything done fast. However, the down side to it is that I won't have as much time as I originally planned to spend with my boyfriend during his semester break. Which sucks.
Then, at 11.30, I went to The Store [Sungai Buloh] with my younger sister to get her hand phone cover, fix her phone, as well as eat lunch.
On my way there, I received a call from my lecturer this morning saying that the office lady said that I canceled the registration of the subject. So there was a slight argue over that matter. After that call, the college lady called me to inform me that the student parking pass has, FINALLY, arrived.
We ate at Pizza Hut which now I do not ever want to go back to, as their knife had some weird black substance on it. At first I did not notice and slice two pieces of my pizza and ate it. On my third cut, it was sideways so I actually saw the black substance stick onto my pizza. So, I called the attending and all she had to say was just 'oh? Bagi saya tengok' and when she saw it there, no sorries and she just took it away [along with my slice of pizza] and gave me a new set of cutleries. Annoying much? The worst thing is that they still dared to charge me the 10% service tax. Stupid people. Should have made more noise and don't pay.
After all that annoyance, and sending my sister home, I went back to college to attend the extra class. The first thing the lecturer said was, 'does anyone know what you will be able to obtain by studying this subject?'. Silence. 'You?'. 'I have no idea'. Of the original 13 people, only 1 answered. Lol. Then more and more people entered until there was 30+ people? So the class went on about effective communication and after that we went out for a little activity. Message passing! The game we used to play in secondary school. My team's sender, is an Iranian, thus, the difference in English slang which is pretty hard to make out. So the las sentence which was supposed to be 'a big black bug bit a big black bear' became 'a big fat bitch'. Thank god that was not read out loud. xD.
Now I'm sitting here blogging, while waiting for my dinner to fall down from the sky~! [Goes to scoop soup]

12th June 2008

2008-06-12T18:17:00.002+08:00

Last night, my boyfriend told me that he'll be delivering something to me. He told me that in the middle of the night. Since it was him, naturally I believed. So couldn't sleep until 3 in the morning wondering what he was going to deliver. For the past few days, things weren't going too great so it really cheered me up.
Funny thing happened this morning. I set my alarm to 7.40 hoping that I would be able to get something from my mum before she left for work. So I had a dream that I woke up, barged out of the room but she already left. Then I went back to sleep. Later at 9.30 I really woke up. Because I didn't manage to wake up earlier, I had to drive all the way to my mum's place to get the cheque, which is in Sungai Buloh, then drive to Damansara Perdana, then to Taman Tun. Few hours later, drove to the vet to get LaxaPet for my sister's dog, who cleverly swallowed a durian seed.
At 4.40, my delivery came~ my boyfriend was delivered to me. In a suit. And he finally gave me a book of love poems which he had been planning to give me for quite some time. He's really a sweet one. Though the time we spent together today was short, it's one to remember. The short one hour is carved in with details which you need not know. Love. Is indeed a very special thing.
Tomorrow will be another tiring day. Looking after the part time maids really sucks. I have no idea what type of attitude they have nowadays but they always talk back and complain a lot. What's the point of working as a maid if they just end up complaining? That's just stupid. Before that is was 'how am I supposed to wipe the floor clean if I cant vacuum it?'. Live with it, my vacuum broke down and my mum dislikes brooms. And if my mum can wipe it clean even without vacuuming first, why cant they when their specialty IS cleaning. Even farther back, and Indonesian maid was worse. She actually had the guts to say 'this is not apart of my job' when we asked her to wash some stuff. They are all just bull shit.

10th June 2008

2008-06-11T01:51:00.003+08:00

My 7th week of holiday. Outcome:

Finished 1 1/2 scarfs
Almost finished with Suikoden 5
Constant driving
Constantly losing and gaining weight
Bought a lot of stuff from Singapore
Going nuts
Being lonely

Being lonely isn't a good thing. I'm going nuts. I need the company. Need. I'm feeling real really helpless nowadays that it sucks big time. Can't get all these negative thoughts out of my head. Home alone most of the time. Parents at work, sister at school, other sister working. Boyfriend studying. Everyday life has become a routine. During the holidays, its fetching sister around, doing chores for mum, gaming a little, knitting. And after all the lunch, dinner and whatnots, its back to bed. Then comes the next day. During classes, its waking up, going for classes, lunching, working and then, back to sleep. Even my so-called rest days are becoming a routine. Saturday is fully booked by my sister while Sunday morning by my mum. Then, everyone goes back to their own business and thus, alone again.
Sometimes I don't know what's right and what's not. When I think it's right, it just turns out wrong. But it never works the other way. Was never with any luck anyway.
Always putting up a smile and saying 'ok'. Is that me? It's just so that people won't leave me alone. But with every extra time I say 'ok' to everyone's request, these requests become even more frequent. One day, it might become a burden that I'll no longer be able to carry. When that day comes, will they leave me? Will I no longer be needed? Or maybe there will just be a big 'useless' label on my forehead. Saying 'ok' to please people all the time means keeping everything in. Maybe that's why sometimes I go crazy.
I don't know what to do anymore.